TIM: Well, I'm feeling a bit spurned, rejected, left-out.
DEB: Are you serious?
TIM: It's been days Deborah! What am I to think when I don't hear from you for days on end?
DEB: Um, well, considering that I come to you when I'm experiencing internal conflict, I suppose you can consider me...I don't know....healthy?
TIM: Well, your mental health is absolutely alone-ville for moi.
DEB: Moi? Who are you, Ms Piggy?
TIM: Fine, you know what I mean though. You can't even stop in for a nice "Hello" or "Hi Tim, how are you" every once in awhile? You have to be tortured or upset to speak with me?
DEB: Tim, it's the nature of our relationship. You represent my angst, my struggle du jour.
TIM: I can't believe you just said "struggle du jour", what are you, a menu of emotional complaints? Do you get salad with that?
DEB: Been watching a lot of TV lately Timmy boy?
TIM: I have to kill time some how.
DEB: Books.
TIM: Looks who's talking! Earlene? A girl and her mac?
DEB: That's called "creative out letting".
TIM: You totally made that up.
DEB: Whatever.
TIM: !
DEB: Oh my gosh, now you're not speaking to me? Tim? Tim? You have to speak to me Tim. This is your blog! It's called "Tim Gunn's Voice", not Tim Gunn's Cold Shoulder! Why would anyone read Tim Gunn's Cold Shoulder?
TIM: I'd read it if the shoulder was turned against you!
DEB: You don't mean that.
TIM: *sniff*
DEB: Tim. I'm not that healthy. Really. The quarter's almost over. I have classes coming up that will crawl under my skin and send me raging against the system. You know this. It's just a matter of time before I am a loon....a raging loon...and to whom will I turn when that happens Tim? Huh? To whom?
TIM: Impressive use of grammar...
DEB: Thank you. I did it for you my friend.
TIM: Well, some one's going to have to be here for you. Goodness knows those men you live with can't handle existential crises or fragmented personality disorder. Fine. I'll stay here for awhile longer. Oh for crying out loud. Carry on!
DEB: *sigh*
