Wednesday, April 28, 2010

TIM GUNN TALKS ME THROUGH HAIR COLOR

TIM: Oh! For crying out loud, why are you sitting in the dark?

ME: I'm too lazy to get up.

TIM: You're lazy, true. But you know you have to turn the light on eventually. Are you hiding? Oh no. Did you color your hair yourself? Deborah...

ME: I couldn't do the gray thing. I said I would go completely gray and white, but I didn't do it.

TIM: Okay. Would you like to talk about it?

ME: Tim, if you're showing up, then apparently I need to work on it, right?

TIM: Well said. Here *flips on light* let's have a look. *scrunches up face* That's not TOO bad.

ME: Oh my gosh. I said that when my kids baked their first cake. They were 2 and 3.

TIM: I think "pastry" would be a good description of your hair right now.

ME: Tim...

TIM: I'm thinking, white cake, white icing, with some white piping along the edges. It would be almost elegant if it wasn't on you. You know, a "signature style". Are you ready to pull that off?

ME: Don't make me smile.

TIM: I was serious about the pastry. And now I'm hungry.

ME: I had every intention of growing out my hair. It was kind of gun metal gray, with some groovy white streaks and some lighter gray.

TIM: Oh! I know! I saw it.

ME: Yea, I suppose you did.

TIM: So then, why did you back down? You were very determined.

ME: I was at my daughter's house and she really appeared to be having a difficult time with it. I mean, the poor thing is pregnant, she recently broke her neck and her back, she has these kids, you know....a lot of stress.

TIM: So, your daughter made you do it?

ME: Well, not when you put it like that.

TIM: How would you put it?

ME: I would say it like this, "My daughter made me do it."

TIM: Uh huh.

ME: Ummmm...yea.... That doesn't make a lot of sense does it? I mean, when I say it like that. It sounds weak and it sounds like I'm shifting accountability for my decision to someone else. Ick. Self-realization and truth give me a headache.

TIM: Wow. Keep this up and one day someone will blog about Deborah Katz's Voice. Wait. Probably not.

ME: Hey. I can be wise.

TIM: Maybe someday...when you're old and gray.

ME: Nice....

TIM: Let's bake a cake!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOL!

p.s. my hair kinda looks like cake. dammit.

The Katzbox said...

@Nancy. HAHAHAAHHA...Eli was describing the kids' hair and he was having some difficulty with Charlie's. I asked Eli if Charlie had crooked hair and he didn't seem to think so, but it's early so maybe the jury is still out.

Rach said...

Ah, I love your blog.

The Katzbox said...

Thx Rach....I love yours as well :)